February 6, 2012
 
A-ROD ADMITS TO DOING STEROIDS FROM 2001-2003 AND WEARING LIPSTICK
FROM 1998-PRESENT



BOOM MIC TO HEAD
LEAVES AIKMAN
WITH CONCUSSION



N.Y. YANKEES SNAP UP
NAMING RIGHTS TO SIMPSON / WENTZ BABY



CHARLES BARKLEY: "I'LL BET YOU
A MILLION BUCKS THAT I CAN GET
ELECTED GOVERNOR OF ALABAMA"




CHARLIE MANUEL HAS
PHILLIES ON BRINK OF
WORLD SERIES TITLE




RED SOX EXPLORE PITCHING OPTIONS AFTER SECOND
STRAIGHT A.L.C.S. BLOWOUT




NY RANGERS NAME CHRIS DRURY
CAPTAIN; SOMEWHERE MARK MESSIER IS WEEPING




THOUSANDS WATCH IN HORROR
AS ANACONDA ATTACKS
TENNIS PLAYER




REPUBLICAN SOFTBALL TEAM GROWING TIRED
OF MANNY'S ANTICS



TOM BRADY INJURES CALF



TRAGEDY STRIKES POLAND'S WATER POLO TEAM AS THREE HORSES DROWN




INSPIRED BY L.P.G.A.'S ENGLISH MANDATE, LOCAL DUNGEONS & DRAGONS CLUB PRESIDENT REQUIRES MEMBERS TO SPEAK ELVISH BY 2009


 
   PHIL MICKELSON UNVEILS
NEW SPONSORS UPON TIGER
WOODS' RETURN TO TOUR



MADONNA CONFIRMS
A-ROD NEVER ASKS
WHAT IS BEING PUT
INTO HIS BODY



MANNING BROTHERS CHOKE IN FIRST ROUND OF DOUBLE STUF RACING
LEAGUE PLAYOFFS



BURRESS A DISGRACE TO
PLAXICOS EVERYWHERE



CLOSE-UP OF NORV TURNER'S FACE FORCES
THOUSANDS TO CANCEL H.D. SUBSCRIPTIONS




CLASSY PHILLY FANS
CELEBRATE CHAMPIONSHIP
WITH DIGNITY AND GRACE
 


NEW SPORT INVENTED SOLELY SO WILL FERRELL CAN MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT IT




A-ROD WIPES KETCHUP OFF HIS
FACE WITH HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL IN FRONT OF NYC HOMELESS




IN AN EFFORT TO APPEAL TO YOUNGER VOTERS, McCAIN USES WWE STYLE ENTRANCE TO DEBATE 




NEW YORK MET FANS FIND
BREWERS' CELEBRATION
HARD TO SWALLOW


POLL: MOST PEOPLE WERE HUNGRY FOR MORE CHINESE OLYMPICS A HALF HOUR AFTER CLOSING CEREMONIIES



LITTLE LEAGUE WORLD SERIES
ROCKED BY STEROIDS ACCUSATIONS

 
"BEING THE FASTEST MAN ON EARTH HAS ITS DOWNSIDE." -USAIN BOLT

 
OLYMPICS AFFECTED BY POOR ECONOMY AS I.O.C. UNVEILS THIS YEAR'S GOLD MEDAL


ESPN'S TIM KURKJIAN ENTERING  
33RD YEAR OF PUBERTY



  
METS CELEBRATE BLACK
HISTORY MONTH BY
SIGNING ANOTHER LATINO



OMAR EPPS BECOMES
YOUNGEST ACTOR TO
WIN SUPER BOWL



TORRE CLAIMS ZIMMER AND STEINBRENNER HAD LONG STANDING LOVE AFFAIR IN NEW BOOK





McNABB PREDICTS 24-24 SUPER BOWL XLIII FINAL



NHL ALL-STAR GAME HAS MORE
GOALS THAN VIEWERS AS
EAST WINS 12-11




NOTRE DAME REPLACES 'TOUCHDOWN JESUS' WITH 'THREE AND OUT MOSES'



INVESTIGATIVE REPORT UNCOVERS WIDESPREAD USE
OF URINALS IN WNBA
LOCKER ROOMS




LAKERS' FORWARD LUKE WALTON'S STALKER ARRESTED




TORRE, RANDOLPH SHARE PASSIONATE KISS IN
CELEBRATION OF NEW YORK
TEAMS MISSING PLAYOFFS




TATUM BELL CAUGHT STEALING TEAMMATE'S BAG; BENGALS IMMEDIATELY OFFER HIM
FIVE YEAR DEAL



CHRIS 'MAD DOG' RUSSO MOVING TO SATELLITE RADIO WHERE HE CAN MISPRONOUNCE WORDS AND NAMES WITHOUT FEAR OF CENSORSHIP


 OLYMPIC INVESTIGATION REVEALS CHINESE GYMNAST ACTUALLY 
13 YEAR OLD ROBOT


IN HINDSIGHT, U.S. GYMNASTICS COACH REGRETS SENDING VERTIGO SUFFERER TO COMPETE ON BALANCE BEAM


SPITZ WHO? PHELPS HAS SIGHTS SET ON MARIO'S GOLD RECORD




IRON SHEIK STUNS HULK HOGAN TO TAKE HOME WRESTLING GOLD
MEDAL FOR IRAN


 OBAMA TABS USAIN
BOLT AS RUNNING MATE
 






 
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